Monday, November 15, 2010

Law and Order

My life is chaotic and I make no bones about that, but in my efforts to always be up for anything and everything, I've allowed myself to completely ignore the maintenance and upkeep on my apartment. Sometimes I think living in the present moment (a basic tenet of the zen meditation and yoga practices to which I'm dedicated) thwarts our efforts to stay organized. It's almost as if responding from a unified/integrated place to immediate stimuli also means completely forgetting the total downer of responsibility. I'm sure I'm thinking about this incorrectly.

I loathe the cycle of excess and austerity that often characterizes my life. I would say that the sense of mania that used to color my appraisal of my social life has not been present for some time, but my life is just as stuffed as it was when I was new at my job and trying to be all things to all people.

I'm not the only one, either. I have several friends who keep themselves busy to the point of insanity. I'm going to put a stop to it soon for myself, because I'm simply treading water in a lot of areas of my life, when I'd prefer to be making progress. It will be hard, because I so enjoy the company of other people. Perhaps it is time, once again, to enjoy my own companionship more.

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